I like my independence. I like knowing that I control my day-to-day, my schedule, my choices. I like knowing that the people or things that do take up my time are there because I allow it, and if one gets too onerous I can block it out. These are some of the many reasons I choose to stay single.

But there are times, oh, there are times.

Times when the quiet of my apartment does get to me just a little. Times when I wouldn’t mind there being someone to talk to, someone to be cute for, someone to intrigue just a little.

When I’m down I do appreciate the solitude. I prefer my breakdowns to not have witnesses. And we all have them–anyone who’s never had a low moment and just lost it, completely and utterly broken, are either lying, overdue, or seriously medicated against such things. It’s natural.

But then there are nights when it’s quiet, calm, and you don’t really need anything from yourself or anything else. Those are the nights when it would just be wonderful to lean your head on a sympathetic shoulder and appreciate that particular moment. That’s what I miss: Permission to lean.

So, it’s a little after eight and you’re mentally cataloging the closet, cross-referencing the weather report for tomorrow, and verifying your calendar during a commercial break. An outfit is decided upon so you go to the closet, assemble the various parts, make sure nothing needs repair or revision, and return to the television program already in progress.

Then there goes that little voice in the back of your head:

Self, it says, you know what would be great with that outfit tomorrow? A necklace. Earthy, a little chunky, basically nothing you have in your jewelry wardrobe. Too bad, it would really go great with that shirt.

What’s a girl to do?

Well, if you happen to be me you head into the Abyss (which remains navigable), collect a supply of semi-precious stone chips, a focal bead you haven’t had the first idea what to do with in 2 years, tools, and wire and make the damn thing yourself! To be honest it came out pretty doggone spiffy if I do say so myself.

Do you know how long it’s been since I just made something for myself on a whim? Me neither! It felt so good not only to be creative but to have a piece finished in 2 hours, ready to wear and pretty much the way I pictured it. Instant gratification, baby! (Something not often seen around these parts lately I might add.)

I’ll try to get a picture posted tonight, there’s no time to fiddle with that just now. Yay for new shiny!

I don’t know what carries it but I’ve certainly been bit… and how!

I have the attention span of a newborn fruitfly and a host of other inclinations that are best left unsaid (I would like to retain some infinitessimal shred of, um, propriety for days that I actually have to be a grown up). Woe for the unsuspecting, though, you just never know what I might come up with!

But I happened to forget my allergy pill yesterday morning and payed for it with an early night last night. Not that there was much to miss around my place, but I hate a ‘wasted’ night. Oh well, it was only knitting night and I did get a little work done on the second guantlet. I had a couple of other ideas to try out but I think it’s best to work on pattern creation when I’m not so distracted, headachey, and tired. Maybe next week?

Oh, wait. It wasn’t a total loss of an evening. I did find a very cool, very red lipstick this afternoon. I might need a different lip-liner, though. Here’s a hint for the non-girly out there: red lips really should be lined… keeps things from looking messy and prevents bleeding and feathering. Also, using a lip brush to apply give highly superior results. Yay for the return of the vamp-lip. Have I ever told the story how a total stranger stopped mid-walk on his way through a room, turned around, and said ‘Excuse me, but you have the most incredible lips’? Well, I guess I just did…

Happy Hump Day my Peeps!

Though I really wasn’t keen on any sort of traditional excercise last night I did decide to give housework-as-cardio a try. 40 minutes later not only can I actually walk to the closet in the Abyss but things are stacked in a good imitation of an orderly fashion. Oh there’s plenty left to do in here–no where near complete–but it’s a start. A good one.

After that it was 2 hours and 1 glass of red wine with iWeb. Not exactly a hot date, in fact it was rather tedious, but I got the basic site in place and uploaded to the test site for the powers that be to have a go at it. I want to say the worst is over, but I know better.

I have to say that as much as I mentally fought off doing anything of substance last week, avoided cooking like the plague, and totally ignored the plans to workout, getting back into the groove of things last night by cooking dinner and prepping my breakfast and lunch for today and all felt really good. I think every now and again I need that sort of break, but the routine really is comforting.

Which means tonight will be another night of staring at iWeb. I found some links I missed on the original transfer and I need to redo the first side navigation menu and create the second one. Then I think it will be at a good point to upload another copy to the test server so the officers can see what I’ve done and add their contributions where necessary. Once I get that in place it will be time to go off-book as it were and start doing some of the code-tweaks and formatting things iWeb won’t let me do on my own. Probably in another two weeks I guess.

Not that I was having a ton of luck with computers this weekend. Yesterday my mouse was giving me fits so I figured it needed resyncing (being wireless and all, it’s a logical thing, just like recentering the pad on the laptop, it needs to be done every now and again). Well, that was probably the worst idea I ever had since it effectively killed the mouse. Yeah. Um, how in the world am I supposed to do ANYTHING without a mouse. Yes, I love keystroke commands as much (or more) as the next person, but really? A mouse is necessary. Thankfully I have my graphics tablet with its pen and mouse so I was able to hook that up, navigate around to the Kensington site and refresh my memory about the resyncing. Even after that it only worked about half-way: the buttons worked, and the scroll-wheel scrolled the page, but moving the mouse did /not/ move the pointer. Problem? I ended up sending a tech support email just before I had to leave and when I got home there was an email offering me a replacement. Kudos to Kensington for being on that ball. Stuff happens and I can work around it, and soon I’ll have replacement bits.

But in the mean time I had to go do tech-support for my little brother’s computer. I am a firm believer that when I am able to give tech support, the world is truly close to its end. Took about an hour of fiddling and then I tried my failsafe: uninstall Norton firewall and, lookie there: all fixed. That’s twice, folks, twice that Norton firewall has taken over someone’s computer even when it wasn’t activated! Norton is evil, pact with the devil evil. Which might be why the world is still standing: if I defeated someone with a pact with the devil, then the four horseman, it would follow, are stalled, not called into action. Glad to know I didn’t bring about the end of life as we know it after all.