Scraps (n. ,fem., singular)

Which to write about? The awesomeness that was the NaNoWriMo kick-off last night at All Saints or the whole lotta normal that was my test results? Hmmm….

Well, let’s just cover both, shall we?

First off: Test results (because they happened first). Picked them up from Dr.Z’s office yesterday and, mind you I didn’t talk to the doctor yet (my appointment isn’t until the 13th), but the lab lists the allowable limits for each test next to my level and, basically, there was a whole lotta normal going on. Meh. I was really hoping that somewhere in those 24 vials of blood (23 on Monday, 1 on Tuesday) that something would show up. Thyroid checks out and totally normal, so the Hashimoto’s Thyroidism doesn’t seem likely. My Cortisol went from high-normal to the basement after the corticosteroid treatment, which is what a functioning set of adrenal glands do, so Cushing’s Syndrome doesn’t seem very likely either. I looked up the factors for the Metabolic Disease in the NET ‘bible’ and we’d really be skating a thin line to call it that.

The one thing that was elevated beyond the allowable limits was my Serotonin. But not very much (sigh…). when you’ve got a spread of 197 points and your only 14 points over, is that enough to convince them to keep looking? I realize that in order to play by the rules you have to have biochemical findings to support further exploration both to keep from wasting time and money and to reduce the amount of wear and tear on the patient (for instance they don’t want to irradiate me too often if it’s going to keep coming back normal). I get that. But also, on the converse, having a strong theory of what is wrong and yet having to wait until it gets bad enough to show up on the tests doesn’t seem right either. It’s like finding out the foundation of your home is starting to crack… do you go ahead and fix it now or wait until the house caves in and you can undeniably confirm it?

Anyway… I got down to Shand’s on Thursday and, hopefully, they will come up with something. Since I have the test results maybe one of their gurus can look at everything together and pick it out. Maybe it’s like one of my friend’s has said and it’s several small things working against each other, but heaven only knows how we’d figure it out. Plus, on the 9th I go for a consult with the GI, and if nothing else will get the endoscopies done and maybe their cameras will find something to lead us in the right direction. Mom, bless her heart, is really hoping that they never find anything. I know she means well but, really, if they don’t find it they cannot treat it and that’s not exactly helping when we know *something* is wrong!

NEXT!!!

The Kick-Off last night was absolutely stupendous! I knew the RSVPs were rolling in but still I thought it would be manageable until I did a tally yesterday and counted almost 30 positives!!! I hastily sent out an email and updated the post on the forum to show that we would meet on the back porch of All Saint’s Cafe. After getting stalled by a train that just decided to STOP on the tracks (after already being the longest train in creation) when I was but a block away I still managed to get there at 5:30 and some people had already showed (? shown?)–people were already there! But at 6pm we were looking at maybe a dozen. Okay, I’m cool with that. Things came up, no problem. I was feeling a tad better about not being overwhelmed. So I started my talk, introduced myself, and asked for a show of hands of how many newbies we had. All of them (well, except Palmetto, but she was sitting to my side so I wasn’t looking out at her so much). So I start to go over the basics and I hear something behind me:

Apparently, despite the emails and forum posts and the sign I put on the front door of the coffee shop there were several people sitting inside waiting to spot the day-glo yellow shirt I’d said I’d be wearing. (Seriously, y’all, this shirt will burn the retinas!!!) So then, after the word spreads, in comes another dozen plus people: We ended up with 28 WriMo’s OMFG!!!!

Once everyone was signed in and back settled I just had to stop and look around and say ‘wow’. Everyone laughed. In fact, for the most part, I had them all laughing pretty much throughout. (pardon the moment of ‘they like me, they really like me’) The puppets, though, were a very big hit. Of course they were dorky and the Henson family of puppeteers will not be calling upon me any time soon but, no, really, they came off rather well. My attemps at audience participation didn’t quite go over great but, you know, you can’t have everything. Then, per HQ’s request, I plugged the photo links and Flickr site and got everyone (but Palmetto) to pose for a group picture. Will have to get that off the camera tonight after the Halloween party at Julie’s.

Wonderful, wonderful weekend.

Okay, so there were some unpleasant parts, but they were completely overshadowed by the good parts.

Mainly, the Pumpkin Party was a rousing success. I think an even dozen is the perfect number for this sort of party–at least with my current space constraints–as we were short a couple of expecteds and we ended up with at least a half hour between everyone finishing their pumpkins and the allotted judging time which could have accommodated the two MIAs. The pumpkins themselves were fantastic, my pumpkin lights made another appearance (though lacking an extension cord I couldn’t show them off lit), the food was a hit and I even managed to have almost everything finished before guests arrived! The only thing I was still working on was chopping the mango and tomato for the salad (I also needed to set out the drinks) so I consider my timing to be vastly improving.

Once the early pumpkins were carved some moved indoors and a movie was started that pretty much took us to dinner time. Various conversations ensued and then it was time for the judging. Now, for those that have not had the chance to attend one of my Pumpkin Parties, the way this works is I designate 4 categories, create the prizes for them, and whomever does not carve or decorate a pumpkin gets to judge. So far we’ve never had to fall back on Plan B which is having everyone cast their ballots in the four categories. The winners this year were:

• Tracy, Most Original, for her Glow-in-the-Dark Painted Spider Squash
• Me, Funniest, for my Monkey Pumpkin
• Kim, Scariest, for the Puking Pumpkin (figured to be the nightmare of partying pumpkins everywhere)
  and
• Mom, Wildest (aka Best in Show) for her Kitty Cat pumpkin.

Then we came back inside, cut the cake, and forced ourselves to eat a smidge more food. The cake was a 3-layer spice cake with cream cheese icing, pecans coating the sides, and a caramel spider web on top (very similar to one you’d find at Williams-Sonoma online but without the $65 price tag!). This brought forth a discussion of Mom’s discovery of a carrot cake mix in her pantry that expired back in 2004. ( !! ) She said she also had a can of frosting and wondered if it ever expired… it didn’t have a date after all. So, theories flew about saying that if it was green when she opened it she might want to check the label again.

Mom: (giggling) Well, if I peel back the lid and something waves at me I might need to put the lid back on.

Various people: (waving and looking up) Hi!

Bob: (with hands on hips, he’s seated by the way) It’s about damn time!

See, it’s almost like you were there, right? I assure  you, nothing waved or spoke when I opened the icing container. I promise!

Wild partyers that we are, most people had left by 7:30 (hey, it’s a Sunday night, I *intend* for it to break up early!) and those remaining were talking about various and sundry things including such things as the Bible condemning one to hell for calling their brother a fool, and how Julie’s brother was quite enamoured of the stories they left out of Sunday School as a child–namely David and Bathsheba to which I was then directed to look up and read a passage of scripture about diseased loins. Yes, we’re all going to hell. It’s not news.

I should have known, really, that subtitling a party ‘Gourds Gone Wild’ after the chest-baring line of videos would lead to only one thing: a field trip to the 24-hour X-Mart. A garter belt was needed before Tuesday but while we found one (a very pink one… and the shopped was not fond of pink) the payment machine was down.

Julie: There is a slight problem with the machine. They can’t get it up.

Jen & Jenn: (blink blink) 

So, after wandering the store a bit, it was decided that the seeker could come back the following night, now that she knew where it was, and hope that the machine was back up. The reason we went to the X-Mart over any of the other adult stores in town was the preponderance of creedy old guys with comb-overs and stained shirts sitting behind the counter at the majority of the stores. X-Mart, on the other hand, seems to be continually staffed by non-threatening college-agers and is therefore much more hospitable for female shoppers. Add to the fact that it is opened 24-7 and not all that far away, and you’ve got an optimal shopping experience. Of course, if you are sensitive to incense or perfumes you may want to wear noseplugs or a mask, it was quick thick in there last night.

# # #

After the field trip everyone dispersed and I finshed the little bit of cleaning up left to do and watched another episode of House while hooking the laptop back up on its table next to the sofa. I was debating on whether to tackle the Kick-Off Meeting project I had in mind or to scrap it for later as I checked my mail for urgent issues and caught up on the few forums I watch. Then, when Angela’s Eyes was pre-empted for the second half of a movie, I saw that Hairspray was on TCM and that The Village was starting on FX about an hour later. Having wanted to watch that for a while and figuring this was a bit of a sign, I went ahead and got out the super-secret project to be revealed to my WriMo’s tonight and stayed up way too late finishing the super-secret project to be revealed tonight but actually went to bed right when The Village started to get spooky. I knew if I kept watching (it was 1am already) I would never get to sleep.

Yes, I’m a wuss. Deal with it.

I am feared
I cut men down to size,
Burst their bubbles,
Show them the error of their ways.

I am righteous indignation
Not for myself but for those close to me
I blast asses
I correct assumptions
I make men quiver in fear

I am a woman scorned
Her rights denied
The sword of justice
Kept in its scabbard only by sheer force of will
I am wrath.

Yay! We have tickets! We thought we’d found a deal through Orbitz but, by the time we could get my aunt on the phone to make the reservations they had been sold out from under us. Such is the travel game, no?

She tinkered a bit, had sessions time out and all manner of increases after 2 seconds but finally found flights on Delta that DON’T go through the dreaded Charlotte and get us there and back at reasonable hours. Granted, we’re flying into Newark (which I cannot say without over-pronouncing the final ‘k’ in a separate syllable) but hey, this means we get a 90 minute tour of the New Jersey countryside coming and going. Hah. But hey, I get the window seats! Woot!

In other aggravation, I decided to call and check on my referrals since I had yet to hear from the gastroenterologist about setting up an appoint and while I’m not exactly looking *forward* to getting tubed, it does need to be done. Well, imagine my surprise when not a single referral showed up under my policy number. Not even referrals to the current specialist or to Shands! Oops!

Thankfully I soon found a human being to ask about it (instead of just the automated system) and there IS the gastro referral but none of the others. So…. after a few calls to my doctor’s office and being assured that the nurse has ‘got my back’ (which made me smile more than cringe I’m happy to say) those referrals should be taken care of shortly. Which is good, because I certainly wasn’t interested in driving 2+ hours to an appointment only to be stuck with more than just a co-pay! Also, I now have an appointment with the DDC (digestive disease clinic, how appetizing!) for an evaluation. Sheesh, that’s three appointments with three different doctors the first three weeks of November. This is going to be such a fun month…

There is, apparently, a special level of hell reserved for people trying to book a flight around Christmas. Whoo-boy!

First, being the web-savvy person I am, I checked out travelocity, expedia and yahootravel only to be completely confused by the who’s and when’s of the convoluted mixed flights. I though I’d scored big with yahoo only to have it double in the time it took to look into more details. Ouch!

After pausing for a few hours I decided to take the less evil path and go directly to the websites for the airlines that flew out of our airport. Soooo much simpler, but definitely not less expensive. The lowest total (and this is for four people leaving at the beginning of peak Christmas travel… yes, we’re brilliant, okay?) was $2100 flying through the dreaded Charlotte airport. The next airline up (which at least went through Atlanta, not CLT) was $1K more!

The question is quickly becoming… does my Aunt really want to see us THIS badly???

Monday are not, apparently, productive times. This is good to know, but not especially comforting to the stalled to-do list.

I take that back; work was incredibly productive, I feel like I really did get a fair amount done. It was just after. After, Mom wanted to go for a drive in the car-to-be-named-later and then she took me to dinner to celebrate the whole brand new car phenomenon. Here’s where I get a little stupid. We had options, one of which was seafood, so I picked that. Said seafood place was having a shrimp more ways than you can imagine deal and I was starving (it being an hour past my normal dinner time by then) so that’s what I ordered.

Now, shrimp are not high in tyramine, they are harmless little things, but add sauces and pasta with one (which I only ate a bit of the pasta) and the salad and part of an apetizer and a baked potato and suddenly my starving happily made a pig of self was not so happy. Large meals and rich food does not a happy me make, apparently, and that really sucks. I should have known better, I was over confident I suppose. Live and learn and be reminded, right? Sigh…

So the rest of the evening was spent rather lethargic-ally. I took a book with me to the tub and soaked a while (oh how I dream of a claw-footed deep tub where only my head emerges from the water and the book has to be propped up on one of those trays across the water…) then knitted a bit while watching CSI before turning in for a restless, wakeful sleep. (more like a series of naps, really)

I’m not cranky, I’m not mad, I’m just tired and very ‘meh’. But it looks like I’m going where it might snow for Christmas! More on that tomorrow I think…

Okay, so the title is definitely un-inspired, but hey, it’s accurate!

I didn’t post this weekend (bad blogger, bad) but it’s because I was getting so. much. done. Seriously. After hanging up the combo cork & dry erase board I bought 2 weeks ago (yes, I know… ) I made myself a generalized list of tasks to be tackled in various areas. There were 14 items on that list and by bedtime Sunday night I had finished 6 of them and two were being worked on. Not too shabby if I do say so myself!

Some of the big things tackled were finishing the clean-up of the living room and dining room which are both, for all intents and purposes, done! Wohoo! I have a couple of small stacks of magazines to go through and cull for ideas and articles, but that’s perfect to do while watching CSI

Also on the done list is some prep for NaNoWriMo (municipal liaison stuff) and flyers for the dance show on Dec.1; all-in-all a satifying weekend, but still plenty of stuff to do this last week of October (where did the time go?).

That’s what I’m working towards right now. Normalizing the chaos and craziness in my life.

I had several good talks last night with friends about what was going on and to at least one I said ‘I’m finally, now, done with the prodding of people. I’ve felt like, in these last few weeks, I was constantly poking someone saying ‘hey, pay attention, fix this’ about both me and my car. Well, the car has been traded in, all I have to do now is make the payments. I’ve got the attention of the doctors and its in their hands, processing the lab tests so all I can do is wait, at least for a little bit. I can finally rest.’

In 2 weeks I go to Shands. So for two weeks I get to work on things that I want to. I get two weeks of not fighting, of not having to worry, of reduced stress levels. I also found out that the mural project no longer has a Dec.1 deadline for completion, so whew! I can take some more time on that. There’s an event this weekend but I decided I really just needed the downtime. I’m going to rest and play on the computer (because I still ahve projects… always have projects) and work on getting the apartment ready for next weekend.

I feel so much better about things in this particular moment.

So. Took the car back in. Dropped it off. Waited for a call.

A very nice lady by the name of Carol called me to get some information, faxed me some forms to fill out, and then more waiting.

After work, Mom drops me off at the dealership, I see Phoebe sitting outside the service bays, waiting for me. Go in, pay for the sensor repair, get me key back, then actually meet Carol. The finance guy is still working on the numbers so I wait a little more. Then Carol comes to me with the deal.

It’s not bad. At all. I didn’t get both incentives, but the value their willing to give Phoebe is almost what she would be worth in Pristine condition so, yeah, score there. Plus I did get a sizable Loyalty discount. Enough to cover (with the trade in value) what I owe plus cover the sales tax, so really I’m only financing the actual cost of the car. With 0 down because, after all, not only was I not expecting this I just spent $480 repairing the car I’m trading in.

But still, my car payment would go up about 100 a month and while I can afford it, do I really want to. That’s the big question. So I polled a friend and my mom (which is very unlike me because, hello, I make my own decisions usually without any outward evidence that I’m thinking on making one until I declare my decision). They both agreed that the deal was a good one, more than I would ever get again, really, and did I trust Saturn enough to buy another car from them.

Good points, all.

So I needed to run an errand, pick-up-and-drop-off style, and I realized that when I got into the car I was totally paranoid. Was the light going to come back on? Was that a noise? Did the car just jerk? The flakiness of Phoebe was driving me absolutely bonkers!

That pretty much made up my mind. I knew that once I got back home I’d crunch numbers and if I could truly afford it (not just mentally say, yeah, I can) I would call Carol in the morning and set up a test drive and if that goes well, I’d have a new car. There. Done. And I did and I will. Some months might be tight at first, getting used to the new budget (meh…) but I can handle it and things will equalize out over time. Plus, when I looked back over the suggested maintenance repairs Phoebe also needs, that’s 500-700 more in repairs that, well, now I won’t have to worry about!

I named Phoebe after one of Saturn’s moons, which is named for the goddess of bright intellect. Time I should use some of that, no?

That would be my stomach this morning. So the medical portion of this week is largely over… I’ve done my part, now comes the waiting. This morning, however, is part two of the universe’s campaign to totally derail me:

Haggling with Saturn.

Now, anyone who has seen the ads, or maybe has been to a Saturn dealership, knows that Saturn has a no-haggle policy. They don’t ‘deal’ on the price of their cars. So, okay, I know this. And I’m not being naive enough to expect this. What I am asking–oh the pipe dream of it all–is for full value of my current vehicle (the one I’m trying to offload because of the issue after issue after issue) and the combining of two current incentive deals they’ve got going on all the while without raising my car payment more than $100. Yes, hope springs eternal and optimism really is folly, but if you never ask, then you’ll never know, right?

Basically I’m giving Saturn their second chance. They probably had no way of knowing that Phoebe was defective (because really, why else would I have this many bizarre electrical problems in a row…), none of the other Saturn owners I know have had this much trouble with their vehicles, so it’s a fluke. And, granted, on this most recent repair (that of the O2 sensor) they’ve done me a favor and waived the labor charges. (Of course, this was not the cheaper front O2 sensor, oh no!, this was the more expensive rear heated O2 sensor that had to be ordered–I’m only lucky I didn’t have to wait until Friday for this part, they 2nd-dayed it)

It could almost be their third chance if we count the tire incident.

See, when I bought Phoebe last year I was concerned that the tires were a bit worn. I asked about it and was told that if they were below 50% they would replace them. I brought in the car that weekend (because the very important spare tire was missing as well) and they assured me that there was PLENTY of wear left on the tires. Okay. I had my doubts, but okay.

9 months later I go to have said tires rotated. The two driver’s side tires are separating and the front passenger is wear-bar low. There was MAYBE one useable tire on that car, so at that point, buy all 4. Now, when I bought the car it had been a lease previously and had 31026 miles on it. Probably the original tires I’m thinking. So PLENTY of wear would have been what? 15K? 20K? I mean most tires are rated for 50K nowadays, aren’t they? So you tell me why 7500 (maybe) miles into that PLENTY I needed 4 new tires??? No, it doesn’t equate in my book either. But I had the money at the time and this way I knew my tires were good and it would be one less worry. But still, Saturn played me there, I’m pretty sure.

So, anyway, another day, another hassle, another hour or so lost from work (oh the lack of overtime this month will be staggering… sigh…) and another monring spent TRYING to get back on track so that I can meet that wonderfully cyclical Sales Tax deadline this week.

Here’s hoping!

23, y’all. That’s how many vials of blood I had drawn yesterday morning… I declare, if they don’t find SOMETHING in all that you might as well… No, not going to tempt fate.

But since I’m a numbers nerd, I wondered really how much that was:

• 8 of the little lavendar tubes at 4mL each (32 mL)
• 14 of the blank and red tubes at 7.5mL each (105 mL)
• 1 of the red tubes at 10mL

147 mL The joke all day was, of course, do you have any left? Apparently I do since I get to go back today and have 1 more tube drawn after taking a double-dose of dexamethazone (corticosteroid) last night. This one will supposedly tell the doctor (by guaging the biochemical reaction to said drug) whether the Cushings Syndrome that we suspect (in conjunction with or maybe instead of the Carcinoid) is merely overproductive adrenal glands or a tumor there or elsewhere. Or at least that’s what my reading leads me to believe.

The plan is, I hope, to have all these results back by the end of the month so I can get copies to bring with me down to Shands on the 2nd. I have no idea how they handle long-distance patients but knowing what I do about different labs and proprietariness, if we can cut down on how many tests THEY need to do, it might cut down on how many times I need to drive to Gainesville in the coming month(s). This is presuming, of course, that something shows up on these tests. I won’t go into my whole spiel about it, but I still think ‘normal’ (when you know something isn’t) is the worst world in the medical dictionary, second only to ‘unremarkable’ (which is what the lab techs used in the CT report from last year).

In other news, my bedroom closet is cleaner than my bedroom, after pulling nearly everything out and then rearranging everything in the bedroom itself. I’m not 100% on where the bed is right now… I feel like I’m listing downhill when I go to sleep. Perhaps I should buy a level to see if it’s just me or if the room really does slant a bit? But I think once I get some projects done in there it should shape up to a happy space. The studio, on the other hand, is still in need of some serious attention but after a cleaning urge hit Saturday night at 2am it’s better. There’s even room to move the rest of the boxes hanging out in the front of the apartment into there so guests won’t see my american-chipboard-decorating theme. I mean, really, it’s just *so* last season…

Ahhh, soon the holiday season will be upon us and I really am looking forward to them. For some the ‘holidays’ don’t really start until Thanksgiving week. Me, I prefer to have them start at Halloween, as it is becoming more and more one of my favorite holidays.

One thing about holidays that I truly love is parties! Both attending and giving. I simply adore having a room full of people all happy and laughing, enjoying their food and drinks, it’s just one of the best feelings I know. Unfortunately, entertaining in such a small space makes throwing the large shindigs that I love a little more difficult.

For my birthday party I invited everyone I could think of and just figured we’d figure out space as best we could. Very much the image of the party in Breakfast at Tiffany’s running through my mind. I think somewhere between 15 and 20 people came, and it was pretty much all that could comfortably fit. And I use the term comfortably very loosely.

So now when I think about throwing a party, I realize that sometimes I’m just going to have to be more selective about the guest list. I need to watch how many people are coming, and make sure the ‘mix’ is right.

In my mind, duties of a hostess include:

• providing a warm, inviting atmosphere for guests
• inviting people who will mix together well without drama
• serving ample food and drink for the scope of the party
• planning suitable games or pasttimes complicit to the party’s theme

Vis a Vis, the duties of a guest would be:

• making the intention of attendance known to the hostess
• being pleasant and cordial for the duration of the party
• avoiding drama with the other guests (not always the same as the above)
• not expecting (unless one is actually the guest of honor) to be the center of attention and instead sharing the limelight equally

I truly long for the days where party ettiquette was instilled from childhood, accepted forms and courtesies followed, and all of that idyllic 50s stuff that I was born way too late for. Ahh, false nostalgia, isn’t it grand?

There are still places where old customs are cherished, though it’s usually for ill rather than good. Southern High Society still very much lives in that world, Mardis Gras being a notable example. Oh, not the drunken revelry in the French Quarter that the masses flock to, I’m talking about the Crewe Society and the Balls and festivities that the locals participate in and worship.

A fictional (but highly plausible) example exists in the novel Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil.  The main character is known for this one party a year where only x number of invitations are sent. Everyone who is anyone–and some who are not–wait expectantly for those invitations each year and it is somewhat of an honor (though dubious in certain cases) to receive that engraved slip of paper. Sure, some miss certain years due to certain indiscretions or slights to the host over the past 12 months, but I recall the host having a sardonic sense of humor about being able to pick and choose among the cream of society each year.

While I would never hope to weild such power for petty slights, the highlight for any hostess is to have such invitations be coveted. Until then, I shall keep throwing my small gatherings, mixing up the groups and themes and so forth. Happy holiday everyone!

I seem to exist in a world full of ‘almost’. I’ve ‘almost’ got a diagnosis. I’ve ‘almost’ finished a project. I’m ‘almost’ out of debt. Sometimes it feels like I’ve ‘almost’ got a life.

Is this just a symptom of the human condition. Is it a product of always reaching for the next thing, of never being satisfied? When do we get to say its truly finished?

When we’re dead, obviously, but even then, what waits for us beyond the veil?

Some days I find a tremendous amount of comfort in the cyclical nature of my job, the seasons, and time itself. Other days I truly understand what prompted someone to shout ‘Stop the world, I want to get off!’

Also, I know that much of the ‘almost’ I do to my self. Again, I recognize that my tendency to become so focused on one thing, one hobby, one interest, one person can lead to overload and burn-out. Thus, to prevent the loss of interest in things I love, I am a confirmed dilletante. I suppose I could be a little less of one, but I also tend to take things to the extreme (which is how I got here in the first place, remember).

So, ‘almost’… I suppose, then, that this post is ‘almost’ done…

I think I may have forgotten to mention here that when Phoebe went back to the dealership it turned out that her ECM (emissions control module) was going bad and needed to be replaced. Hallelujah for the emissions warranty I didn’t even know existed because this repair (to be done on Friday… apparently parts don’t come in any other day) won’t cost me anything. Whew!

Not that I’m suddenly free of financial burden or anything, because one of the things I left out from Tuesday’s dr’s appointment is that he wants me to see a GI (no, unfortunately I don’t get to play with a sailor on leave… drat!) for upper and lower endoscopies. And I already know what the copay for that torture is. And I should be hearing from Shands soon, apparently yesterday’s phone call was verifying some info for my intake form so that wheel is turning as well.

The apartment got a little bit of work done in it last night, not a lot, but I did move the bench-cum-coffee table into place and I really like the way it looks. My yarn fits nicely into it as well, so that’s an added bonus. Now, if I can plow through the monstrous pile of magazines that need to be culled for pertinent ideas and inspiration and move the boxes of data tape cartridges somewhere (probably the studio) I can put the round table on the other side of the loveseat and have an almost real living room!

The bedroom is still a disaster, but I need to do laundry tonight so hopefully that will spur me to do the preliminary tasks in there before I move the bed around. I think the 3-panel memo board is going to move to the living room which will then free that wall space for the sofa table that I want to use as a vanity, also meaning I can move the chair for that out of the living and put the old computer chair as additional seating until I decide on a replacement. I have a straight-backed chair in the storage room that needs refinishing and a new seat, maybe that will happen sooner than expected?

NaNoWriMo is approaching quickly but I’m psyched that I have just about all of the meetups I plan to coordinate arranged for. I need to decide on the mid-month meet-up (which will probably just be at a coffee shop somewhere) and the TGIO for 12/2. That’s the easy part. I had this wonderful brainstorm the other night as I was trying to go to sleep about a little mini-book I could do as part of the goodies this year. The goodies are also going to be a lot more streamlined and participatory, making it easier for me to put together and haul around. Yay for simplifying!

And one last thing. Cheesy as it may sound I actually enjoyed my little online class through the hp Learning Center. It was basic webpages with html but since I did that whole crash course on how to build a webpage in a weekend (that’s the store site, btw) with Dreamweaver I missed a lot of the basics. Most important to me was learning the very useful interpage links which I knew I was going to need for one of the Barony projects only I didn’t know what it was called. Sad, huh? And y’all, the world might be coming to an end soon since I was doing computer tech support for a friend’s computer this past Sunday. Something is very wonky in the world if *I* can do tech support lol Not that it was graceful or a tactical strike but I got it done and now she can use Firefox and iTunes and AIM without Norton’s nasty firewall intruding.

Oh, one last thing (I promise). To all my friends who are sick right now: I would normally offer to come see you, or bring you stuff, but, um, with all I’ve got going on there’s no WAY in hell I’m exposing myself to your germs. I love you dearly but if I’m a magnet for those sorts of things and if I get sick right now it could seriously impact a whole bunch of stuff. So I’ll light a healing candle for you tonight and send you good wishes through the interweb but that’s about alllllll I’m gonna do!

Little Orange Jug
Oh how I hate you
Little Orange Jug
Your presence I despise

You take up my weekend
Ruin my plans
But if diagnosis follows
I’ll consider you a friend.

Ah, yes, the wonderful medical homework one gets when one is trying to figure out what in the hell is wrong with one. Oh well, honestly I’m not all that irritated because, really, I just skipped 6 months of waiting and that’s not a bad thing.

A nurse called yesterday to tell me I had an appointment with the new endo… in April. (what is with me and april medical issues? some divine retribution for the birth process? anyway…) Also reported is that the o-scan decision was sent down to Shands to see if they would process the request (something about the insurance not denying their referrals as often as local ones? again, anyway…) So while I wasn’t incredibly thrilled by more waiting, there wasn’t much I could do about it (how Zen of me…)

1:14 and the phone rings. Its the new endo’s office, the dr has had a cancellation can I be there at 2pm? Sure! So I scurry out of the office to first go home to grab the Gianormous Binder of Research and Records then back to the hospital end of town to fill out paperwork and wait. And wait some more. And a little more waiting, but it’s okay, because Z finally saw me, we talked (he was not happy about how I ended up in his office, but he got over it) and then did the laundry list exam and then set up some tests.

A few things to note: He’s a chatty little guy and boy-o-boy you really have to listen hard to get the english around his spanish accent! He didn’t mind the amount of research I’d done, said it made his job easier since he didn’t have to explain as much to me. He has some concerns other than the carcinoid, but he’s testing for a spectrum of things this first round and then we might still need to wait and try again until we get biochem.results that will support imaging requests. But hey, he’s willing to work on it and I think (once I could get some words in edgewise) that I adequately convinced him I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get a concrete, treatable diagnoses.

The main hunch from him is either a Metabolic disorder or Cushing’s syndrome. After looking up the former, I don’t see that I’ve had those symptoms but hey, test away doc, but the Cushing’s I was planning to ask him about anyway as I do have some things in common with that possibility. Of course the latter issue brings us back to a tumor-issue and it can be a carcinoid tumor raising cortisol levels instead of serotonin (or both), that type of adrenal tumor can mimic the CS so again, we’re not too far away from the original idea. I only say that because then I don’t feel like I’ve wasted time researching something totally unapplicable. PCOS was also mentioned, in relation to the Cushing’s, but again, I’ve had no symptoms so… who knows???

But I’m happy with the progress that at least appears to be happening. Any theoretical plans I might have had for this weekend need to be altered a bit, but not so much, and two days of lab work and stuff next week might still lead to a hurry up and wait, but maybe these tests will point us in a working direction.

the picture of Cosmopolitan Singlehood Sophistication? I mean, there I was by 7 o’clock last night in a t-shirt, flannel leggings, fuzzy slippers and my hair pulled up and tied with a ribbon from a perfume I’ll never make enough money to afford sitting amidst the detritus of my living room in it’s post-shuffle state. Tres chic as I sorted through paid bills, unread magazines, dvds and cds without sleeves and various other flotsam and jetsom.

Why is it that a room looks worse when there’s a few odds and ends still scattered about than when everything is piled up on the floors? Is it because of it’s unfinished state? I mean, even in total chaos a room that’s been dismantled is still in a recognizable state. I suppose that the odds and ends that defy easy classification and/or that are without homes just appear more clutter-ful than things waiting to go back to their appointed places. Poor detritus orphans lol

Some would say that if they don’t have a place then they go in the trash. I don’t necessarily agree with that since somethings I just ran out of shelf-space for or need a second CD binder to hold the extras.

I did hang up the wonderfully cheesey sunflower painting I did to go over the sofa. I need to adjust the lamps a bit more to keep it from darkening things up but other than that I think it works okay. I like that it’s cheesey, made even more so with a bit of dimensional paint and a silk butterfly added. I’m a little excited about having a room that doesn’t look like so many disparate pieces tossed together for once. And being able to put the incredibly cheesey painting on the wall, and cover the couch however I want are little steps of freedom I haven’t been able to take before. Nice to know I can still discover a bit more spine at the ripe age of 30

What was it that put me over the top last week for having a ‘bad week’?

That Damned Red ‘Service Engine Soon’ Light.

And what was it that took two trips to Saturn and more than two hours away from my work week last week?

That Damned Red ‘Service Engine…’ Light.

And what was it that cost me $350 to get turned off last week?

That Damed Red ‘Service…’ Light.

So what did I least expect to see as I drove home from Publix yesterday afternoon?

That Damned Red Light.

# # #

Back to Saturn Phoebe will go today and I really hope that its something simple, that one connection wasn’t tight enough and after driving around for two days it came loose. But honestly, my odds aren’t that good, so I’m not placing that bet.

Oy!

Yesterday (and Friday night I suppose) was brought to you by the woman who did too much. My body is *not* happy with me as evidenced by each attempt at moving my right shoulder or left hip. What made me think I could go tossing books and cases and tvs and seating around without consequence??? Hmm??? Beats me.

So today I shall do very little. I am going to sit here amidst the clutter and work on nice, sedate computer projects, go to knitting in a few hours, then grocery shop. That is it!

Meanwhile the Lifetime horror movies will keep me entertained

Let’s file this under: This way lies madness

So! Last night I *was* going to go to First Friday to see the dancers and take pictures. Well, by the time I got home from picking up my car (Phoebe has a new air pump and solenoid now) I really just didn’t feel like going out again. So I sat down to knit for a little while but then I really wanted to accomplish something so I decided it was time to do a little rearranging.

My word but I have a lot of books!

See, I decided that I wanted to rearrange the living room just a bit and that meant that I had to shift one of my bookcases a little bit. Of course, it’s one of the big bookcases and piled with books, so all the books had to first come off of the case so it could shift to be flush with the wall. But when the books went back on I started to organize them (another benefit to this) but it also meant some books came off the other big bookcase so that all the cookbooks could hang out with their friends, etc.

Of course, that began a chain reaction. Since all the books that came off the one bookcase weren’t all going back on it, the other bookcase had to be emptied to reorganize those books and, while it was empty, I might as well move it over a bit. Then there was the three-shelf case that held DVDs and other stuff, which I decided to empty and move over by the dining table between the two cases there, which meant also emptying the two-shelf case.

Of course, in the way of that plan were a few of the boxes that hadn’t gotten unpacked yet. And before I put the DVDs onto the tv stand shelves I might as well move it over, too. And then I might as well scootch the big chair over and up a bit so I can snug up the side table and move the couch over a few inches.

What a mess.

At one point I took pictures from each corner of the room to show the absolute chaos that reigned. I would show them now, but I really want to wait until I get the other bookcase in (yes, a fifth one…), the new bench/coffee table (that I picked up tonight; would you believe that I had never been in a Bed, Bath & Beyond store before tonight???) in place of the round decorator table and the loveseat recovered with the fabric I picked up at JoAnn’s today.

So you can see where a simple idea can lead me…

I had hoped to rearrange both the living room/dining area and my bedroom this weekend, but I may put off the bedroom for next weekend. That’s going to require the moving of practically everything in there, not to mention so actual decorating.

I’m still a bit baffled, to be honest, why I’m messing with otherwise functional rooms when the ’studio’ is still an absolute wreck and until it gets cleaned I don’t get my mini mac. I suppose it’s possible that, with so much chaos going-on on the outside and creeping into my surroundings that I feel like I should work to control what I can. It’s possible. Of course, it’s also possible that I just got fed up with having things helter-skelter and before I have people over at the end of the month it might be nice to spruce up the place a little. Either way, using what little energy I have right now to do something that I will see daily does a lot towards making me happy, so whatever works, right?

Wow… I would almost ask where my week went, but yet I know and remember and am choosing not to think about it right this second.

Thursday passed with no drama, no surprises, and even a few laughs. It was quite a change. Granted, I felt very drained, very ‘blah’ for the vast majority of the day, but the business meeting was amusing and the stop by the dance studio was brief. I watched the girls run through the numbers for tomorrow night and chatted with a couple afterwards and then went home to rest.

I tell you what, the most disappointing thing about yesterday was ER. Mom missed it and I had to tell her she didn’t miss much. There’s way too many holes because of last week’s fast-forwarded timeline. Maybe next week will be better, Morris is always good for a pecadillo.