Scraps Of Life

Dare I even ask?

How long it's been since I last posted? Well..I can look it up but I'm not sure I really want to know.

I'm still pulling out from the depths of despair I was bobbing along in, but I'm spending more time with my head above water lately, and my creativity has increased. I sewed some this weekend, started work on some card projects, even beaded a bit. Still hit blocks of frustration and apathy, but deadlines will take care of that one way or another. :)

Surgery consult was annoying. Aside from the fact that what I thought was a UP3 is actually another surgery and the UP3 is what I would need to start with, it was pretty wishy-washy on everyone's part. Oh, that and the factoid that a UP3 w/tonsillectomy is the most painful surgery the ENT does...isn't that spe-schul??? I have yet to decide if I will go through with that. It might not fix it enough to get me off the CPAP yet it will undoubtably be a benefit on several levels as long as I can avoid some of the not-so-common side effects of a changed voice, inability to swallow correctly, and inability to keep liquids from flying out my nose.

Doldrums

Main Entry: dol·drums
Pronunciation: 'dOl-dr&mz, 'däl-, 'dol-
Function: noun plural
Etymology: probably akin to Old English dol foolish
Date: 1811
1 : a spell of listlessness or despondency
2 often capitalized : a part of the ocean near the equator abounding in calms, squalls, and light shifting winds
3 : a state or period of inactivity, stagnation, or slump

Yup...that's the word. This has been my status frot eh last couple of days. I'm still not sure if it's hormonal, situational, or both, but I'm really leaning towards the second one. I'm feeling the loss of my pedestal once again (another story for another entry one day) and experiencing a host of insecurities simultaneously. I would cite the exact issues but do not want to come off seeming like a complete whiner...yet...no matter how justified I may consider them.

One thing is certain, this website is my attempt at building my own pedestal, but as you can see construction isn't going too well. Just like the sidewalk near my office, monsoon season is running interference and the earth movers are taking up all the parking spots.

The beads called to me...

When I went to the bead show Saturday I really didn't plan on spending much and I was mainly hoping for a vendor to have a good deal on sterling silver chain. It's a small show and I really wasn't in a shopping mood, but I knew if I missed it I would kick myself. So I went, paid my $8, got my bracelet and proceeding to make my first trip through.

I did not find any silver chain, good deal or not, and even the vendors I shopped from last year had nothing of true value for me. But there was one table, just a table on a corner, with no fancy displays or signage, just bags and bags of a variety of beads. And what an assortment he had. I softed through packet after packet, and finally inquired as to the origin of the assortment. Turns out this stock was what was left after a beader of 30 years passed away.

Some of the beads looked like they had been previously strung and then dismantled, some were still linked and in their chain formation. and then there were just bulk beads of all sorts imaginable. First I found some deep purple teardrops that really caught my eye, but I laid them aside. I hadn't made it all the way around the room yet and didn't want to spend what little funds I had too quickly. But I kept looking as another customer moved away, opening more of the table to my wandering hands.

What finally did it was this packet of costume pearls in various sizes. They looked like they were part of some previous jewelry and also in the package were some small gold-tone metal spacers. The combination was quite obvious and I new I just had to have them. After all, the package was only $2.00 ! So I picked up the pruple drops again, some large (maybe I should say huge!) purple beads that I still don't know what I plan to do with, and a mixed bag of e-beads in various hues and finishes all in a salmon color.

Last night I started stringing, the pearls just lead themselves to a very elegant vintage-lok necklace-braelet-earring set with a few beads left over. I'm still in need of some matching hardware before they are truly finished. Hardware is also needed to complete the salmon ensemble, which is currently seven 10" strands between some high-polish pewter findings, an ajustable clasp is to be added and 5-strand waterfall earrings are laying, waiting to be strung on my work-table. The purples are still a project-in-waiting, but I'm thinking they need some black beads and chain to balance their vividness and I just remembered some square ab crystals that will enhance the violet drops.

....it's good to be creating again.

Troubling

That's the best word to describe last week. Not the least of the troubles came from the phone in the form of numerous hang-up calls all week. Now, one or two is just a nuisance, but we reveieced about a dozen this week, and with the increase of home burglaries in our city, I was understanably nervous.

Now, long ago we decided it just wasn't worth the money to have caller id or anything like that, so we cancelled all of the services so that we cannot even *69 a call. What to do to find out who the caller is??? First a call to Sprint Corporate Security to find out how to trace calls. Then once you get a successful trace you have to call your local law enforcement so that THEY can retrieve the trace information and follow up on the caller. I'm now waiting for the Sheriffs office to get back to me.

A Zippy Situation

Friday, just before going round to hand out paychecks, I notice (by some strange luck) that the zipper had gone out on my favorite khaki skirt. Not a good thing. SO I tried to get ingenious and thought I could simply roll the skirt up (it's almost ankle length) to end-of-zipper height and go from there. One problem: Rolling the skirt that high made the ample walking slit in the back an elevation. Makes the term "split skirt" take on a whole new meaning.

Resigning myself to the inevitable trip home for a wardrobe change (on a day I really could not afford to do so: I was taking a late lunch for a dr's appt at 4pm) I tied my Mom's sweater around my waist and went on with my tasks. While at lunch, still contemplating running in the nearest Beall's for a quick pair of capri pants (speaking of which, I need a nice, tailored, black pair....guess i better get sewing, eh?), I had a revelation. Quick trip to the bank and the drive through of Whataburger (my first...can you believe that?) and I was back at the office, plan in mind.

I brought the stapler into the ladies room, but turned out not to need it. I kept with the original plan of rolling the waist band up, but this time took a bit of care to avoid poofing (a problem with the first quick-fix as well). Then I employed the brainstorm: rotate the shirt 90 degrees so that the show-all back slit becomes a somewhat daring but still tasteful side slit. (The stapler was to extend the (now) side seam if it was still to high.) Thus I made it through the day at wiork, through the doctor's appt and through a quick trip to Office Depot for a folding table.

Nice huh?

Unmasked

Strangely enough I woke this morning without my CPAP mask....but I went to bed with it on and do NOT remember taking it off in the middle of the night...very strange. I guess my mini-workout just plum tuckered me out!

In other news I am gearing up for the Party Saturday. Tomorrow I go get the folding table I need since I have RSVPs that exceed my kitchen table capacity! Wohoo! I think I have enough of an assortment of chairs to get by without buying any of thosse just yet lol My office is rather a train-wreck, but that's not such a big deal to me compared to giving the kitchen a good wipe-down....guess I'll go do that now!

Women Swhirlled

A new day is dawning (in the middle of the night...yes, I get the irony...) for me. Maybe. I hope. It is my intention at any rate.

Mom comes to my door today and says: "So Jennifer, what are you doing after work tonight?"
Me: "uh...going home?"
Mom: "Okay, there's this gyn, Women's World, that is having their open house today through closing at 8 or whatever and, if the place is nice and the pricing is doable, I'd be willing on paying for both of us to go and work out together and, in doing so, keep each other motivated. Are you interested?"
Me: "Sure, I guess."

So after work we went to check it out and it was nice, the pricing was, in fact, reasonable, and Mom signed us up. Past gym experience in full memory, I thought that if it was something I was paying for, I would definite follow through. That didn't happen but do you honestly think I'm going to waste my mother's money (keep in mind I see her 5 days a week at work)??? You've GOT to be kidding (and I told her as much....guilt would get me there if nothing else!).

Tomorrow night we go for our first trainor session to get weighed and measured and introduced to the machinery (most I am familiar with) and get our "plans" devised for our little yellow chart that we fill out as we work and then, every 6 weeks, our poundage and inches get compared. Then, Thrusday night we go for a newbie class, basically getting started with a workout program, the way the gym does certain things, yadda yadda. After that the plan will be (tentatively) to work out every Wednesday and Friday after work and then on Sunday afternoon, one hour each session, thus improving our overall fitness and meeting our personal goals. I want to lose inches and fat, Mom just wants to be in better shape overall without turning muscle-bound.

I'm still debating, but I think I might go ahead and start a separate fitness journal in tandem with this page to recount my adventures. Perhaps a bit of cyber accountability (along with Mother's guilt) will keep me that much more motivated. Looking forward to not needing a whole new wardrobe after all!

The sleep of the just

Or at the very least: just sleep.

I finally got my new CPAP and was able to sleep normally last night. (Strange how normal becomes defined as sleeping with an air mask over your nose and tubing all around.) While I wan't hcipper upon awakening this morning, I also wasn't in a foul mood from lack of sleep or being waked by V telling me to roll over, etc. Definitely an improvement!

Bout time! My next step is an appt with an ENT 7/28 to go over the surgery options.

Where am I? Where are You?